At Peace

This is a post from Rebecca’s parents. Sadly on Thursday at 6:35 pm our beautiful Rebecca lost her battle with cancer. 

Everyone who knew Rebecca will agree she was amazing. She approached her illness with courage and determination and with a breathtaking ability even when she very ill to think of others.

We all very proud with all the money she raised for charity and know her legend will live on.

Pam and Richard Dalgleish

A Bad Night

Last update Rebecca wrote for her blog at end of October

So I’m just back from a lovely, relaxing time at Rachel House. Firstly the Ambulance picked me up, but this ain’t no ordinary Ambulance. It’s the new Marie Curie ambulance. With a fridge, (to keep my wine stash 😉). It also had Bluetooth, nice blinds (instead of those silly blue pully things!) and nice lighting, for an ambulance anyway, because I the Dome’s chandelier would fit!. However the ambulance does loose marks on the other Scottish Marie Curie ambulance (that I traveled home in) with a bed shaped into a stretcher, which was really soft and comfy it even had a lovely quilt, so I could get all snug for the 1hr 20mins, home. So I was well chuffed, as I hardly ever get a posh ambulance like that and then I get 2 in 1 trip! 😊⭐.  

Anyway when I got there I went straight to bed as I was aching in pain, and again I got a comfy bed (basically a normal hospital bed but an air mattress on top to stop the big (or small) bed sores from having an adventure on my skin). How that’s not what you would expect from a hospital/ hospice, a comfortable bed I’m warning you in advance not to die of shock at the rarity of it all!! 

Anyway while I was there and sore most of the time (slightly due to a ketamine default) I got my bed wheeled from my bed room to the lounge area, where I got to judge a pumpkin carving competition… There was lots of different and unique designs such as a witch on a broom or a pumpkin being sick (the insides were coming out of mouth) but the pumpkin I liked best were; (I’ll try and put a pic up of them but here’s a description if that doesn’t work out) a salad burger with seedy bread (the pumpkin was cut in half with its seeds stuck on top, then they used different coloured paper; red = tomato and green and yellow= salad and a brown sweety paper = burger) in 3rd place. In 2nd place was a 3teir Olaf pumpkin. It had three pumpkins placed on top of each other, the one in the middle had arm sticks coming from it and the top had an Olaf face. The winner (drumroll…) was a pumpkin with CHAS in bubble writing and on the frount was the CHAS rocking horse, it was so good the lady’s horse was better carved than I could ever draw it! And carving can be pretty hard, well if you want to carve something impressive anyway! 

Although the high light of my Rachel house trip was meeting Stuart Mcinally who plays for Scotland and Edinburgh rugby! 😍😂

I hope this and my other posts about Rachel House, may change the public’s perspective on hospices. Yes it occasionally has it’s sad points, as most would expect, however most of the time there is laughing, playing, decorating and doing activities such as story telling and T-shirt styling. Oh I almost forgot they have Mums least favourite craft item… ⭐💫✨GLITTER✨💫⭐!!! And you can even paint your nails, with glitter!! Both children and adults are happy (giving their situation) here at Rachel house, making the hospis not really fit it’s stereo type (of people crying in the corners and everyone feeling sad and down) at all!!

P.S sorry FB wouldn’t let me upload the pictures 😚 so hopefully iv described the pumpkins well enough. 😊

A bad night 

Well, what can I say? The pain that Friday night brought was horrific, in fact horrific is an understatement. It was so bad, if women wanted a near child birth experiments, my pain could be it, although many women feel blessed to be pregnant, I’m sure my pain could put a few off. Certainly if I wanted a baby id think twice if the pain was that bad! (I’d like to mention that I have nothing against childbirth, I just needed a metaphor to express my pain.😔 and as many women agree childbirth is the sorest thing they’ve experienced, I thought it would be a good comparison.) anyway it was about 23:00hrs when the DR came, after I’d already been in horrific pain since 19:00. With a pain score flashing between 8-9-10/10, the worst pain lasted about 5hrs -I felt terrible, to the extent that I never want to be in that sort of pain again, I’d rather just have an anisthetic for the rest of my days. Unfortunately DRs say the don’t do that sorta thing. 😔 so I’m extremely worried about the next time I’m in that much agony, as it’s really truly awful, lying in bed; feeling like my insides are bursting, while I’m in too much pain to use ‘distraction techniques,’ and then after 3hrs of been in pain the DR comes into a scene of me wailing in agony my Mum trying to comfort me, and my brother sound asleep, oblivious to the bedrooms feasco! In the end the DR raised my amitriptyline by 20% however, after I had the amitriptyline and the other 9 strong drugs I take (in the evenings alone) I was sick, meaning I had hardly any meds to last the deep, dark night. 

Anyway I’m sorry for such depressing updates, at the start of this blog I would comment on my bucket list, and other outings, however now I’m sore more frequently my life sounds less exiting, however just maybe it could support other teams with terminal cancers as there’s not to much support out there for Texans with terminal illness, everything seems to be aimed to older adults; there’s sections on how to tell your partner, children friends… But there’s not really anything about telling your parents. There’s website out there to help children with a dying parent, parents with dying children, adults who are dying, children who’re dying. But I haven’t yet found a professional sight for teams and young adults, yes there’s forums where patients may give each other advice but I’d something with professional advice too. So if nothing elce I hope my rambling may help someone, in someway, shape or form! 

A Year and Counting 

Well not written on here in a while, but honestly didn’t want to bore you with my bed bound life story, however some of you who read this blog have requested a wee update… So peeps you’ve brought boardum on your selfs , you’ve brought it on your self.So on Dads request I’m writing this with a wee glass of rum and coke, ratio 3:2, I’ll let you make up your own mind how strong my coke is… 😉

Anyway, things haven’t been to good over the past couple of months, pain levels are as high as a very high druggy, so have been confined to my bed a lot. And when you’re 18, and your friends are swarying of to Malya and what not, seeing God knows what behind the bike sheads and leaving home. It can make you feel a little bit down, never the less at least I don’t need to do cooking and laundry every night, I’ve still got my Mum. 

So as my bucket list has finished, well the stuff I was able to do anyway iv not been doing much, so I’m glad I finished the list when I was able. But there’s still stuff I’d like to buy, to make my last year comfortable, (I’ll explain my last year later) like some really soft, cotton frost French Pyjamas, lots of ‘jelly cat’ “Bashful Bunnies”, in particular the “really big” ones http://www.jellycat.com/bashful-cream-bunny-bas3bc/ and the really cute black and white one “bashful Dutch bunny ” http://www.jellycat.com/images/products/large/BAS3BC.jpg . I’d also like to buy myself a really big, warm and fluffy dressing gown, and a new watch, because you can never have to much of the things you like… 😍.

Anyway my scan results. Finally I realise why I’m so sore… It’s not just me getting super used to the painkillers, my Monty is a big boy now, bigger than he’s ever been. Ha grown by 1cm and has spread his antics to my liver. No wonder why last week I was finding it so hard to breathe, so I’m at least pleased there’s an answer to my pain, although I’ve been told by my DR, my new DR Larry, that he’d be surprised if I have more than a year in me. 

Anyway if I’m dying of cancer it means 4 other young people will survive, according to the survival rates in tears and young people, to if my death means 4 people will live that has to be a good thing. 😄

Sorry!!!

Would just like to make a small apology to those trying to look at my blog over the last couple of weeks, as I have only just realised how mucked up my HTML is. I have tried to sort it out and make everything a proportional size and so hopefully it is easier to read now than it was!

My Super Sore 18th

Well if you came for a story about a young person who got absolutely bladdered in a club with her friends you have came to the wrong place. Nevertheless I did have a lovely lunch date with my friends. After lunch my friends and I decided to go and walk along the high street where were bumped into a lovely lady who insisted on buying us an ice cream which was just such an unexpected act of kindness! 

My friends and family were also so very kind and bought me a lovely jellycat rabbit who is so very soft and cuddly! And also for getting me a snoopy birthday cake. Because if you don’t know already I love snoopy and his amazing philosophy!

Unfortunately my ‘birthnight’ was not as good as my birthday. Early in the evening I started getting bad back and leg pains of which got so bad kept me up all night, so as a manner of fact, I did stay up all night drinking. Except drinking strong painkillers instead of strong taqueria shots like many on their 18th! But haha I get the last laugh in the morning because although I’m still bedboundly sore at least I’m not the newly 18ed with a hangover!!
No hangover or not I did miss lady’s day at the Musselburgh races. I had been looking forward to going for ages as my Mum said she would take me after I’d turned 18. So years, maybe four years of excitement, building and building up, was all for nothing. Just nothing.  Just nothing but a sad, boring day of been more or less bed bound. However although I was bored I was pleased to have such lovely birthday cards, that people had been so considerate and bought me, to read. It also brightens up my bedroom of which I obviously spend lots of time in, to that has to be a bonus!!. 

Run for Rebecca 

Would like to say a couple of thank you’s to everyone who has supported my Rebecca’s little hearts recently. Firstly as from coming back from a lovely wee holiday I was delighted to find that my Rebecca’s Little Hearts fund for CHAS has reached the £40,000 mark which is just amazing, especially as my first target was £5,000 and all the money raised so far was raised in just over four months! Well done peeps the support means a million to me and a million more to everyone else who uses CHAS in some way!

Also would love to thank everyone who helped and took part in the lodge today. Thanks to everyone who got up out of your warm, cosy beds and ran despite the early Saturday morning start! Further thanks to those on the PTA who made a lovely cake and coffee  stall! Also big thanks to everyone else that was behind the scenes organising the event!